Monday, November 12, 2007

Return From Girls Trip

I'm sitting in my infusion chair at Mayo going between two moods. The highs and lows of my current life are swinging like a pendulum. The balancing act can be difficult and I do all I can to stand firm footed without falling to either side.

The girls trip in the desert was awesome! What could be better than enjoying paradise with four amazingly intelligent and fun loving women? The days consisted of sitting around the pool sipping on champagne, retail therapy, yummy food and then ending each day in the hot tub giggling like teenagers with more adult beverages of choice. Although, if my memory serves me right, menopausal women giggle much more than teenagers. Maybe I should refer to the hot tub experience as giggling like middle-aged women.

I flew into Minneapolis last evening, threw my luggage in the back of my car and proceeded to drive to Rochester. I then booked myself into the hotel and mentally prepared myself for today. Thus.... the pendulum swing.

The plan had been that the current infusion would be the first of the every three week regiment. I was looking forward to having the infusion, knowing I would not be feeling well for a few days this week. That was okay, as I knew I would be coming out of it with extra time to recover and live a "normal" life. I guess the stars are not aligned....that plan has been thrown out the window.

Evidently, my blood counts are still bottomed out. My doctor explained that if I were go to the three week infusion, as outlined previously, I would most likely end up in the hospital come Thanksgiving, fighting for my life and trying to get fevers and infections under control.

The thought had been that with the additional time off these past weeks, my blood would recover and I would be strong and ready to kick this beast with stronger infusions. Not only is my blood not healthy, I am having to accept decreased dosages of chemo and adding Neupogen injections to the mix. (Yes, I said the "N" word!) The doctor is being kind and only requiring four injections.

Needless to say, this has been an emotional morning for me. It's difficult living in paradise one minute and then having to accept the wise words of Dr. Bad News. least I had the opportunity to experience paradise and I still have the memories of California to get me through it. I have Sue and the girls to thank for that. Thank you, ladies!

Oh....and if the above doesn't make sense, I have my infusion of Benedryl to thank for that! Apologies in advance.

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